Why are you talking?

WAIT-ing helps us connect with our kids It was later than I wanted to be awake on a weeknight and yet there I was, in the kitchen arguing. Somehow I had gotten myself sucked in and was fully engaged with an unreasonable 14 year old boy. Truth be told, I probably wasn’t about to win […]
What to Do if Your Kid Leaves Dirty Dishes Laying Around
Poised, charming 23-year old Annie sat on the couch in my counseling office today and told me a brilliant parenting strategy that her dad pulled on her when she was a young teen.
Airplane Travel with Toddlers: Nine Out-of-the-Box Strategies
Before I had kids, vacation started the moment I sat down on the airplane. That all changed when I started traveling with toddlers. And how! When traveling with toddlers, boarding a flight signals the beginning of the biggest challenge of the trip: trying to confine little people with the need for speed into one small space […]
Dear Kerry: “My 13-year old Can’t Stand Me”
Dear Kerry, I am in a really hard corner of parenting – my 13 year old daughter, who I have loved and adored since the day she was born – cannot stand me. Everything I say is met with eye rolls, every request I make is countered with a snarky “Why don’t you do it?” […]
What To Do If Your Teen is Taking 45 Minute Showers
My teenage daughter was taking 45 minute showers. I’d yell and scream at her that she was wasting water. I’d lecture that her showers were too long but nothing deterred her. Finally, I decided to replace action with threats and said “Sweetie, you get 15 minutes to shower and then I’m turning off the hot water.” […]
Success Story! Love and Logic Works with 3 Year Olds
This mom shares her success story using the brain dead statement “I know” over and over again….. My 3 year old didn’t want any of the two choices I gave him for breakfast, so I picked one for him. He was not happy and kept throwing a fit. I empathetically used “I know” about six or […]
How Many Ways I Can Be Naughty at Bedtime?
Three year old Wes used to play his favorite game at bedtime. It was called, “See how many ways I can be naughty.” He was the only one enjoying the game. His single, working dad certainly did not. Wes was very creative in how he played the game: he ran away when it was time […]
Little Kids Want to Be Big Kids
Little kids want to be big kids, and parents can leverage that desire to get cooperation when behavior problems arise. In one example, 4-year-old Emma’s mom asked her to blow her nose. “No!” Emma shouted. Remembering how important it was for Emma to feel like a big kid, Mom said, “Oh, that’s right, I know […]
Don’t You Know You’re Supposed to Behave Today?
For many years now, my children have unwittingly been actors in a drama… the play could be titled “Kerry’s Fantasies.” These fantasies consist of dreams and stories created by a much younger me in which my children are happy and well adjusted, squeaky clean and smiling. In this dream, there is an act by the […]
Disarming Defiance
For parents who deal with children being obstinate, defiant and challenging, here are a few thoughts on power struggles: If we deal with resistance by struggling back, not only will we damage our relationship with our kids and set them up to be rebellious, but we will be very frustrated. It is a child’s JOB […]