To Feel or Not to Feel?

I cringe to admit how many years of my life Memorial Day has been a nice 3-day weekend and not much more than a nod to those who have fallen while serving our country.  But not this year.  This year I feel reverential down to my bones for Memorial Day. Several boys I’ve known since […]

In case you thought I had this all figured out! 😂

Raising a child all the way to adulthood sure can come with unexpected twists and turns. Having been through some rough patches in raising my own kids, I’ve developed a parenting practice that I call “arms wide open” when it comes to parenting teens. During adolescence, it is a teen’s developmental task to become their own […]

Dare to be Daring

“Every time I’ve stepped out of my self-imposed box, I’ve felt more alive, like I’m living the life I’m meant to live.” I’ve been a “good girl” and responsible mother. I’ve lived plenty of my life following the rules. But when I look back over my years, the parts that make me smile the most are […]

Living Imperfectly With Great Delight

Being a therapist is so intimate. In session, some people are more honest and open with me than they are with pretty much anyone else in their lives. I get to hear the sound of their internal dialogue. You know, the inner voices that we all have which are constantly chattering away inside our head. […]

A Valentine’s Day to Remember

Valentine’s Day when I was 32 was my most memorable Valentine’s Day ever. I spent it pacing halls, phenomenally uncomfortable. I did a lot of waiting. My project was going well and then lagged; I was sorely disappointed. I went about it a different way, trying to force the issue. Still no luck. I was […]

Why are you talking?

WAIT-ing helps us connect with our kids It was later than I wanted to be awake on a weeknight and yet there I was, in the kitchen arguing. Somehow I had gotten myself sucked in and was fully engaged with an unreasonable 14 year old boy. Truth be told, I probably wasn’t about to win […]

Starting with the end in mind

  I see so many good, loving parents who pour themselves into providing everything their child could need. Those same parents express frustration with their kids’ entitlement and lack of discipline. “Unappreciative” is a word that comes up often. I see parents who worry about their kids’ lack of drive and lack of resilience. Just […]

Where is my village?

When my girlfriend gave me this dishtowel, I laughed and said in tears, “Yah, the number was 303-7&5-0$21.”  That was her number when my kids were young. That was my helpline when I needed to know if I was being too hard or too soft with my boys. I called that number when I just […]